A Sharknado of Emotions

A Sharknado of Emotions

This was supposed to be a happy, excited post. Because I did it! Remember a couple of posts ago, when I said I needed to get a job that was in walking distance of my house and would let me wear whatever I want? I TOTALLY FOUND ONE! I put it out into the Universe, and it appeared before me, in the form of a book-keeping position at a bowling alley/bar/coffee shop just up the road. It’s like The Secret, which I know all about, because we studied it in my business class at massage school, because that’s what massage school is like.

So, I’ve been working there for the past three days, and I’m really enjoying it, although I haven’t broken out the crazy outfits yet; I figure I’ll lull them into a false sense of security before I really let my weirdo flag fly. Unfortunately, at the end of my first day of work, I got a text from Zeb that his grandmother is in the hospital. She’s going to be fine, and they’re releasing her later today. But I wasn’t able to be there at all, because I couldn’t get to and from (because of the whole no-car thing), and I needed to come back to go to work each morning.

A little backstory, before I go into all the feels: Zeb and I were living in Portland until about a year ago, when we moved about 70 miles away, to the small town he grew up in. We moved here to take care of his grandmother, because his brother was moving out of her house in order to move in with his girlfriend and their baby (they’ve since all three moved back in, but that’s a story for anther day). Someone needed to be here, and we jumped on the opportunity to live rent-free and help out family at the same time. She’s mostly not really sick, just old. Really, we’re just here in case something happens.

And a few days ago, something happened. I won’t go into all the details, but she went to the hospital, and has been there ever since. Zeb has been there with her pretty much the whole time. He came home yesterday to take a nap, and then went right back out. I’m really glad he’s in a position to do so – he’s a freelance handy man, so he’s able to make his own schedule. But it’s so stressful to just be here at home, when I feel like I should be there with them. It’s so hard to know your partner is at the hospital, worrying and stressing, and you’re just sitting at home, watching Frasier on Netflix, because it’s comforting and familiar.

Here’s a picture of my cat, Han Smeowlo, to cheer you up after my sort of downer post.

But I just talked to him, and they’re coming home today! And she’s doing much better! So, hurray! It seems as though life will be back to normal soon, or at least by my standards. To recap: it’s been a roller coaster of emotions over here. No, not a roller coaster; that’s too cliche. It’s been a Tilt-a-Whirl of emotions. I’m excited about a new job. Annoyed that my new job is keeping me from being with family in need. Worried about Zeb’s gram. Worried about Zeb. Excited that they’ll be home tonight. Relieved that she’s doing better. And now I’m going to go bake something for when they get home.

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